In a recent issue of a newsletter from a NYC Church, those who had attended a retreat, along with groups from other churches, were asked three questions when they arrived back home.
The three questions asked are important ones. They were crafted to help them understand the dynamics of both the retreat they attended and, hopefully, their participation in the life of their faith community now that they were back home. I will alter the questions just a bit, but their focus will be the same. How do we fare as we engage in church life here at Old South?
First Question. Members of healthy groups (churches) are contributors and not just consumers. How did you experience those issues at the retreat, and how will you learn from that experience now that you are home?
My sense is that many (most?) Christians in America are consumers. They love the hymns, hopefully the sermon, and certainly the fellowship time during the coffee hour that follows. With the weekly envelope placed in the collection plate they head home feeling good. They may have been challenged just a bit, but not too much. The experience was just great. They were in church. They feel blessed. Consumers.
The rhetorical question poses itself: is this all we are called to be and do as Christians? We have just observed the season of Epiphany: the vulnerable mother and child; the coming of the Magi with gifts that spoke to the difficulties the child would face as he grew; the anger of Herod that someone might usurp his throne; the holy family’s flight into Egypt, followed by the slaughter of all male children two years of age and under. After noting all of that, we haven’t even arrived at the beginning of his public ministry when religious and secular forces were out to destroy him. And we are only consumers? O my!
It is not for you or me to determine what each of us needs to do to be a contributor to the work of the Jesus Movement. The ushering in of a kingdom of love, mercy, and justice in our troubled world is not easy. But it is certainly not for those who are only consumers. How might we shape our lives and our ministries differently, both personally and corporately, in 2015?
Second Question. Healthy communities (churches) are not ‘set family units’ but are porous and open to welcome in strangers and newcomers. How did you experience that at the retreat and how do you hope to implement that now that you are home?
I daresay that in most churches, people gravitate toward those they know. At fellowship hours, at times both before and after worship, as well as at other gatherings, we tend to seek out the familiar faces. But how do we reach out to the unfamiliar face, the stranger and those who are there out of curiosity? I realize that there is a tension within each of us as to whether we are more introvert or extravert and how that might determine what we do. But here is a suggestion that might help all of us. At fellowship hours, as well as at other times, we might consider dividing up our conversation time. Perhaps half for old friends and half for the person you have not yet met; whose name you do not know. This takes a bit of courage, but remember that these folks have come through our doors and are here with us for this moment in time. ‘Hello. I don’t believe I have met you yet. My name is ….’!
Here at Old South, we do a great job with hospitality; we are at the top of the charts in this regard according to those who have visited. But as we grow, we dare not rest on our laurels. New people are coming each week: the homeless, the newly arrived immigrant, those who have just moved to the Boston area, visitors, students. Perhaps dividing our conversation time might be one example of being a contributor and not just a consumer.
Third Question. In a healthy community (church), the risky, yet rewarding approach to trust comes to the fore: trust is given before it is earned. How did you experience that at the retreat and can it be replicated here at home?
I must confess, the first two questions are the easiest one for me. I am a social activist and something of an extrovert. I do not have to work hard at the first two as others might. This third one is a lot more difficult. Trust often comes as we get to know someone better. This is true when you are newly hired and your colleagues are checking you out to see if you can carry the load. It is true in personal relationships. You want to know the person a bit more before you move further into that relationship. Before you invite someone to be the treasurer of your organization, you want to know something of their track record in finance and accounting. And on and on.
But perhaps this question approaches things from a different level. The stranger, the newcomer, even the one who is often there but generally silent – there needs to be an element of trust on our part that their questions, their tentative contribution to the discussion, indeed, their very presence is enough to earn our respect. They, too, are a child of God. We do not know them or what they might think on a given issue. But the element of acceptance, of trust in their desire to be part of the fellowship must be evident on our part. Jesus’ words ‘I was a stranger and you welcomed me’ comes to mind. It is true that people can lose our trust. But that is a different issue. I think the question asks us to be open to the ‘other’ in ways that makes them part of the church family even if they just came through the door. This third question is certainly related to the second one as we initially welcome the stranger into our fellowship.
How we live out these questions will help determine what kind of an institution or faith community we will have. Our response will shape our ministries, both personal and collective in 2015.